Why I need a boob job

BOOB JOB AND WORLD PEACE

I need to get a boob job . It is a matter of life and death , not only for me but the entire world as well . My bigger breasts will bring world peace and make the troops pull out of Iraq (and probably into my driveway . But seriously , there is a legitimate reason why I need to get breast augmentation

Let me start off by giving you my personal reasons why I need breast augmentation . Unlike some people in this world , blondes included , I was never gifted with

amazing breasts . God chose to give me brains personality and a great sense of humor instead . I have already sent him my letter of complaint but still no reply . I digress . I need breast augmentation because my boyfriend is giving me a very hard time . He always grabs my ass because he has no breasts to grab on to . My ass hurts like hell now and if I don 't get breast augmentation done , I fear I will never be able to sit down anymore

I also need breast augmentation because of the scoliosis . I wasn 't born with a perfectly arched back and tend to slouch forward . The breast augmentation will remedy this by forcing me to keep my back straight when I walk

On the subject of physical imperfections , I also have a peg leg . It is humiliating to be walking down the street and have guys and girls alike stare at my peg leg . I feel like I am only half a person with this peg leg and I feel that getting breast augmentation will make me feel like 3 /4s of a woman . It will also keep people from staring at my peg leg and from saying dude , check out the gimp . I can only imagine it now , Dude , check out the rack on that gimp

But enough about the personal and selfish reasons why I need breast augmentation . The real reason why I should get breast augmentation is because I want to bring world peace Statistically speaking , more accidents are caused by driver 's inattentiveness than anything else . This is where my breasts come in My bigger breasts will keep drivers in line . The reason drives are inattentive is due to the fact that there are not enough big breasts in the world . In man 's quest to spot the perfect pair of hooters , he is rendered inattentive to his surroundings and thus frequently gets into driving accidents . My big breasts will reduce the need to searching for big breasts and reduce road accidents

The troops in Iraq need to be inspired . A number of our American soldiers are out there risking their lives for a country that they are losing their faith in . We need to inspire those troops and if I get breast augmentation it will be the perfect solution . Give the troops something to look forward to and inspire them . Three years in the desert with only picture of Saddam...